I had my normal prenatal visit today. I left there happy & sad. My due date is 12/30. My OB & I discussed at my last appointment that most likely the c-section would be scheduled for the 23rd. That made me sad because that would mean I wouldn't be home the morning of Christmas. With 3 kids 5 and under I want to be there this special day! So I spoke with my OB about it today so she moved my due date up 12/29 so that the hospital wouldn't give them a hard time doing the c-section on the 22nd instead BUT now she tells me she is on vacation the week of Christmas!!!!!!!!!! UGH! I LOVE this doctor - she delievered my last baby and she is WONDERFUL! So then I ask her who is on call that day, who would do my c-section. I wish I hadn't asked!! The 2 doctors I was hoping she wouldn't say! I perfer a woman doctor, I just have had bad experiences with male doctors so I try to stick with woman doctors. The one woman doctor has unfortunately a bad bedside manor & the other doctor is a male that I have only met one time and that one time I met him he walked in the room lecturing me about having my tubes tied! I do not even know this doctor! Don't get me wrong I am thankful that I will not be in the hospital Christmas morning but I am bummed about the doctor situation!!! I know I have several pregnant mama's out there that follow my blog - am I crazy?
No, you are not crazy! The Female Doctor who delivered my second child (via c-section) had horrible bed-side manners and was absolutely AWFUL! She was actually fired not long after my daughter was delivered. Apparently, they had a LOT of complaints. I'm not suggesting that...but, just saying...I don't think you're crazy. Instead of it being a good experience...it was awful. I hope yours won't be.
ReplyDeleteNo - you are not crazy! I just delivered my baby boy three weeks ago. I had a very difficult pregnancy and saw several different OB's during the weeks I was in the hospital - some were great, others not so much. My regular OB was fantastic, but she moved to DC when I was about 28 weeks. A male OB took over for her and he was just not as good. I was so happy to see one of the good OB's I had met while I was in the hospital was the on call OB the morning he was born. It is so important to have an OB that you trust and that you know will listen to you.
ReplyDeleteHmmm...could you wait until the 27th or 28th? Would your doctor be back by then? Or does she not want to wait that long for health reasons for you?
ReplyDeleteAmy
That's tough! I missed Christmas last year, but my little girl was only 2. So, she had no idea really. I would feel the same way as you. You want to be home for that morning, but you don't want to have to deal with the docs that you don't like/aren't use to.
ReplyDeleteBonnie
http://bnassau.blogspot.com/
Nope, you're not crazy. I've not ended up with a c-section, but at my 2nd miscarriage had to see another doc in my midwife's office as it was a possible ectopic. The woman freaked out literally when I refused birth control. She told me how irresponsible I was, that I needed time between pregnancies, that I really didn't need more kids (I had 3 at the time, now I'm having #6..LOL). My midwife is not like that, she knows we do not use birth control, and no longer asks, nor has she ever gotten upset over it.
ReplyDeleteI've also had a few doozies for nurses at the hospital in labor. Thankfully, I'm not a shrinking violet (ahem) and so the nurses learn to do it my way or find a new nurse. Yes, I've kicked out a nurse before and told her not to come back. I have always had to be on monitors and had pitocin (even if my water breaks, my body just doesn't feel the need to do contractions - I've been dilated to a 7, water broke, and no labor when I should have been in transition...sigh). My midiwfe taught me with the very first baby how to unhook the monitor cords so I can get up, walk a bit, go to the bathroom, etc without the nurses. Then I just fix all the cords when I am ready to be monitored again. Some nurses have a problem with that - too bad for them.
Sorry you're doc is out of town. How about we hope you go into labor the week before when she's still there? ;-)
Not crazy at all ~ I had a very bad experience my first baby with a male doctor & have used a woman ever since so I completely understand how you feel. I am going to start praying for you NOW and hope you begin to feel peace about this situation.
ReplyDeleteNo, No, No... When I had my first child I ended up in an emergency C-section to save his life. I ended up with a awful surgeon. We ended up writing a letter to the hospital. My personal doctor wrote a letter as well. For the next child I plan the date based on who the doctor was. It makes a difference.
ReplyDeleteI'd be bummed about that as well. I don't know what to tell you. Sorry that happened.
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely not crazy! Its your body, and "your" birth. It should be the way you want it, the way you will be most comfortable. I would work on finding another solution....
ReplyDeleteI don't think you're crazy at all for feeling this way. However, I can see why you would really want to be home for Christmas with your kids. I must admit, I really don't know very much about c-sections, but can they do it after Christmas? If not, I would just spend time in prayer that everything will go well and that it won't be as bad as it seems right now. Sometimes we make a situation worse just thinking about it....or at least I do that!! =) I hope it will all go well for you and on Christmas morning you'll be able to sit and enjoy watching your children enjoy the magic of Christmas!
ReplyDeleteYou are not crazy! I was extremely blessed that my doctor was the one on call when I delivered my son. Now that I'm pregnant with number two, I am praying I get as lucky this time around!
ReplyDeleteThere is one doctor in the practice whom I would HATE to have deliver me. She delivered my friend's baby and told her during a contraction that she needed to "toughen up". My friend is a pretty tough woman, but that sent her into tears. No one wants to be made to feel weak during labor! It's hard enough as it is.
So sorry about your doctor situation, I'd be disappointed as well.
I would totally hate to be in your shoes with that decision. I will lovingly throw some info your way that might help. December 25th isn't actually Christ's birthday anyway. He was born in the fall. So maybe you could do your entire Christmas morning celebration on the 22nd and then have your surgery the next day. Your kids are little enough that they probably wouldn't notice the calendar switch-a-roo much.
ReplyDeleteI hope everything works out best for you so that you're not stressed for the last few months of pregnancy. Whatever brings peace is best!
You are NOT crazy! I'm not pregnant, but I have four kids...and who handles your labor and delivery is important (usually). You do not need the stress or anxiety that an unpleasant or overbearing doc will put on you. Regardless, you can get past it because the important thing is the bundle of joy you're welcoming into the world!! Here's hoping it turns out well!
ReplyDeleteI found you on MMM blog hop! Following you!
Kristin
Keenly Kristin
Your not crazy.
ReplyDeleteMy first child, my son was born by a male doctor. Though he was great, he wasn't even my doctor. Luckily "my" doctor wasn't anywhere around. I really hated him. He shooed me in the office & out with little to any information. I asked how will I know when my water breaks (first kid remember!! I was 20) Anyways he waved me off. you'll know.
UH..no I won't! Ironically when my water did break I questioned it and wondered, wth was going on. Again..first kid..lol
My 2nd was born by male, which again I hadn't even met. The office rotated us around through 7 doctors, all female, one male. Just my luck! I just had to have the male. Ugh, I didn't like that. He barely even looked at me or talked to me. The nurses were there though.
My 3rd I had my wonderful, awesome Midwife, who was Da Bomb! She is awesome and knew what I wanted before I asked. Listened, I was comfortabl. I knew going in labor I would be ok with her by my side. I had her for my 4th as well and yet again didn't let me down.
Giving birth no matter how you do it, IS a a major event (duh, ok that was a given work with me here) it can be calm, or hectic. You can trust or not trust your doctor, and that makes a heck of a difference.
Right now, as a Mom who has had the good & the bad, and the nasty dr's & even nurses, you need to do what YOU feel will be right for YOU.
Your not crazy. Try to get to talk with the Dr who will be there for your c-section and air your concerns as well as questions. I know I would have liked to have met the two male dr's before I gave birth infront of them. You know? It's one thing to know them for a few visits and have them know you by name, another thing to go oh Hi nice to meet you, here catch my baby for me.. *sigh*
I really hope you are able to work things out or at least meet the dr and that will calm your nerves. The best thing to keep in mind, is does he have your best intrests in mind. if he will listen & he looks right at you while talking, he's trying to connect. I think that is the most important thing ever to look for in a dr. Good Luck!
~Melanie
Not crazy at all!
ReplyDeleteNew follower from the Tuesday blog hop :) Hope you'll follow back!
No, you are not crazy. You still have several months before December. Who knows what all could change before then.
ReplyDeleteI love your blog! I am an SAH homeschooling Mom and found lots of interesting things here. Thank you!
JanelleS
www.financiallyfree4ever.blogspot.com
You are definitely not crazy. I hope that everything works out for you. I'm glad that you'll get to be home on Christmas morning.
ReplyDeleteIt totally matters. It only makes it unpleasant when the doctor isn't "nice." I'm sure it will work out fine...
ReplyDeleteno I stuck ith my dads insurance for 20 weeks of my pregnancy cuz i hate change! and then i finally switch to my husbands military insurance to have this horrible doctor and i hated her i stuck it out with her ccuz as i mentioned i hate chnge and well after putting up with her she ends up not even being there on my delivery day because it was sunday wtf kind of crap is that! i was thankful but pissed had i known this i would have just seen who ever would take me lol
ReplyDeletecant you get a different day?
Not crazy ... but could you have Christmas Family celebrations on another day ... it's just this once ... your children could still do something on the the 25th to acknowledge the day (but low key) as they would have already had the "main" celebration .... that way you get to be with the children ... I hope you are able to find a soloution. Glad the scan went well.
ReplyDeleteNo you are not crazy. I'd be feeling exactly the same.
ReplyDeleteFWIW, I freaked out about my appts with my 2nd and 3rd kid. They both came early and I ended up having no say in the matter. with #2 I got MY doctor - how lucky?! but with #3 i ended up in general anesthesia and i'm pretty sure about 4 strangers operated on me...so maybe you'll go early and be HOME already for christmas! thats my wish for you. then you are home and not gone, plus your doc can deliver.
I am so with you there. I don't think there's a single woman who's given birth who will think you're crazy.
ReplyDeleteAww! It will be fine. I've had three babies. With my first, THE person I wanted (a midwife) was on call. It was wonderful. With my 2nd, the doctor on call was not my favorite, but it all turned out fine. With my 3rd, things were going well until the shift changed. Then, the one who came on shift was a female doctor that I couldn't stand. *sigh*. Once it is all over, though, it really doesn't matter. You'll just be so happy to have your new blessing in your arms!
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Cara
I had a female nurse who was downright rude to me when she found out it was my first pregnancy. I'm not sure why. Then my doctor (who was male) thought it would be particularly funny to hold my baby in one hand and the placenta in the other, then ask me which one I wanted. I may be crazy too, but I did not find this joke that funny.
ReplyDeleteAdorable! Im your newest follower from Blog hop Tuesday...dont be a stranger !
ReplyDeleteNaomi :)
I had the same doctor with both my kids, purely coincidental, and I only noticed because my partner mentioned it! Get HIM to act as your spokesperson.
ReplyDeleteOn the other hand, 'lucky' you for being able to plan around Christmas. We're likely to be having chicken nuggets & chips at this rate!
Definitely not crazy - just a concerned mama!
ReplyDeleteVisiting from the Hip Homeschool Hop. I saw the ultrasound photo, and had to comment here. May the Lord bless you with a safe, peaceful delivery.
Congratulations!Such a blessing.I am due December 25.So great to meet you.I am now following you from blogfrog.I follow you,you follow me.Please stop by ,and follow me.blessings,Marla
ReplyDeleteYes! You certainly ARE crazy, no doubt in my mind. But not regarding this issue ;-) I love your doc too. One of the male docs there delivered Jake and I did not like him during the delivery at all. I completely understand. I had a great doc for Sam and it was such a better experience. I also understand you not wanting to miss Christmas morning with your kids. I wish you the best and am praying for you, as usual. Miss ya! Can't wait to see this baby!!!
ReplyDeletexoxo
kristine
www.lovingandlearningathome.com
New follower via the Tuesday Hop!! Congrats on being featured., I know I was supposed to comment on the other post but this one hit home!! You are most certainly not crazy!! I am not pregnant (those days were done for me 11 1/2 years ago) but I do understand the dilemma. My last son decided to come earlier than my planned C-section and my doctor was out of the country on vacation. I unfortunately had to deal with her partner who apparently missed the course on bedside manner. She was crass, domineering, and even made my normally "calm, cool, and collected" hubby angry. Let's just sum this up by saying your feelings are very much justified. I wish for you a happy and smooth labor experience, with very minimal interaction with "the strange ones" that will deliver your child. Peace and blessings!! Beautiful blog BTW!!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Alison, make sure you have someone who is there to remind the staff that you want your body and your baby treated in a certain way. With our first we were afraid to tell the staff what we wanted, by the time we had our 5th my husband was the one that spoke up and made it clear that I would be taken back RIGHT THEN, and I wouldn't be going to triage AT ALL. You see I was in the midst of a rapid birth and she was crowning, water broke in the lobby and I was so upset that they "couldn't find me a bed" that I didn't know what to say. I fully support and encourage women to have birth plans, maybe you can try that. Good luck on whatever you end up doing, just remember that in the end all that matters is that you and your baby are happy - not the staff! :) PS don't be afraid to write down names of people you want to praise or complain about and what exactly they did, that way when you are sleep deprived you can still get your point across. My doctor actually was able to file a complaint on my behalf because I knew the name and time that a nurse became such a snot with me.
ReplyDeleteYou are not crazy to want the doctor of your choice at your birth or to want to be with your family on Christmas. Keep in mind that you can always do your research and go to another doctor. I have changed at 38 weeks before! It really is no big deal. Also, I don't know your exact circumstance, but you don't have to have the c-section when they tell you to. Do you usually go into labor early? If so, then maybe keep the date they suggested. If not, there is no reason to not insist on waiting until after Christmas. After all, you said your actual due date wasn't until after anyway! I have waited even a week after the due date, but I know that if left, I won't go into labor naturally until 2-3 weeks after the due date. The point is, you know your body and the way it works. Pray about it, and make your own decision that you and your husband feel comfortable with. Don't do what the doctor says just because they said so. You have to make your own educated decision. Take your doctor's advice as just a piece of what helps you come to your conclusion. Congratulations by the way!!!
ReplyDeletethank you mama's for all your kind words, all I can do is pray about it - it's out of my hands. I am just thankful for the blessing I have grow inside of me. :)
ReplyDeleteNicole