My one son is 3 1/2 years old. I have never cut the back of his hair, only trimmed his bangs. I love his hair, it's beautiful., with blonde with curls at the end. I am tired of people saying he looks like a girl. I can understand why they might think so, he has a beautiful face but he's always dressed like a BOY! I am tried of people telling me to get his haircut. I have asked him if he wants it cut and his answer is no.
Personally I do not have the heart to cut it because it's so beautiful and it's his baby hair. I am a very sentimental mom. I know someday I will have to bit the bullet and just cut it, just do not have the heart to do so right now. Am I being selfish? He doesn't want his haircut. I know he's only 3 1/2 but he does have a choice. If he said he wanted his haircut than I would take him and have it cut. I am always having to defend keeping his hair long and I am tired for seeing the sad look on his face when people call him a girl. I kindly correct people but frankly I tired of it. It's hard not to care what people think or say, that ultimately I should only care what God thinks but it's hard. Does your son have long hair? What was your response to the comments?
Please respond if you only have something nice to say, let's be respectful and kind as I would be to you.
Thank you!
I don't have a son, but I do have a husband who had long hair for the majority of the time I have known him. People make some seriously crazy comments and assumptions about men and boys with long hair. It drives me crazy!
ReplyDeleteI absolutely agree with letting him express his individuality, plus he has great hair!
We keep our son's hair short. Personally I don't like long hair on my son. I have no problems with other people letting their boys have long hair, but I can definitely see how everyone would mistake him for a girl. His hair is beautiful and he has such a sweet face, but I think as long as you keep his hair that long people will make that mistake. If it makes him sad to hear people call him a girl maybe you should explain that IF he wants his hair cut you will take him, but if he wants to keep it long then people who don't know better might make that mistake.
ReplyDeleteI've realized that clothes don't matter. People call my daughter a boy all the time and I put her in pink, purple and mostly dresses when we go out. Why they think I would put a boy in a pink dress I'll never understand ;)
You are soo funny!! I was thinking of writing the same thing. It drives me crazy! It is their hair- who cares! It goes right along with the gender specific thing I just wrote about. If having long hair makes him happy, than let it grow. As another mom, with boys with long hair I am a proud supporter of long hair on boys. If he likes it than fine. He does not need to fit iknto any social norm. Love you girly- and miss you guys very much :)
ReplyDeleteMy husband and son have long hair although not as long as your son's. His hair is beautiful and if he doesn't want it cut don't cut it. Maybe point out boys with short hair and ask him if he wants his like that.
ReplyDeleteMy family ask me when I will cut my sons hair and I tell them- when he is old enough to tell me he wants it cut then we will cut it. Until then I keep it like I want.
I have a 4 almost 5 year old son. When was a really little guy I kept telling my husband I was going to let it grow in long, but of course I didn't stock to it. There were other things I wasted to try. I am expecting another boy here any day and I plan on trying to let his hair grow out long. I think boys with long hair are so cute!
ReplyDeleteLike Katie .. my husband had long hair when we met and still has it today ... Your son is adorable and his hair is gorgeous ... people need to keep their opinions to themselves - if your son wants to keep his long hair , he is entitled to do so. Celine Dion, and Kate Hudson both let their sons' hair grow, so your son is in good company...HHL
ReplyDeleteI think he has awesome hair!!!
ReplyDeleteI realize that I'm no help in your given situation, but I've wanted to tell you that for a long time. It was nice to get the chance.
I want Robbie to have long hair (as does his Daddy), but the humidity and heat here make him miserable.
God gave him that hair, so it can't be a bad thing.
Ultimately, I think whether or not to cut his hair is up to you and no one else's business. If you are weary of comments, you may want to opt for a compromise. Maybe you might go for a bit of a trim on the sides, a mullet of sorts, that still allows you to enjoy all those curls in the back while enhancing his boyish charm in the front. He sure is a cutie, by the way! Our neighbor's son often got teased about his long brown curls and was often mistaken for a girl. She didn't let what others say cause her to cut his hair until he himself wanted it short. My advice, do what you and your son want.
ReplyDeleteI think he should be able to have it however he wants, although it may be good to discuss it with him that people may think he's a girl sometimes. If he's okay with that, then I say let him have it long! :) But if he wants them to stop thinking that, then maybe it should be cut.
ReplyDeleteA lot of people think my daughter is a boy because she's 2 and still doesn't have much hair. It's annoying-to say the least! Sometimes I get frustrated and sometimes I just ignore them (since she doesn't know any better yet).
With respect and love, I would have to say that clothes and some social norms do matter, so as not to cause confusion. Without being dogmatic and trying not to be legalistic, I would say that I think the bible speaks to this in Deut. 22:5. I believe the bible teaches the principal that clothes serve certain purposes, one of which is to help people distinguish gender. Since long hair is typically worn by girls, in our culture, I can see where your son's (beautiful) hair causes some confusion. Having said that, people can be nicer about it, especially to his face. But I won't chose this for my son when his hair is long enough to cut.
ReplyDeleteThe Bible says the glory of a woman is her long hair. I've mistook little boys for girls, just because it is natural to think a child with long hair is a girl, just as when I see a little girl with a boyish haircut, I think it's a boy. Boys nowadays where pink, too, so it's really hard to tell. I don't mean to be mean, it's just a mistake. People just say what they see, not always nice. If one is fat, it's inevitable that kids and even adults will refer to them as fat. If they have a defect, kids point it out. I wore glasses as a kid and got called four eyes. I had freckles and was called freckles. Whatever we have that is different, people will say something. And even when we don't have anything majorly "different" people find something to say. Such is life.
ReplyDeleteYes, I must agree people do assume crazy things about people with long hair. My husband has long hair and our oldest when he was little had long hair much like yours. Our little toe head hippie, thats what people called him(all in fun of course). I have told our oldest now 13yrs. if you want long hair you have to keep it clean and keep it well groomed. I think he is adorable! Keep up the good work:D
ReplyDeleteI used to cut my son's hair myself, when he was a small kid. Somewhere near the older kid/teen years, he grew it long. Later teen years, he declared it too hot in Houston for all that hair and wears it short again.
ReplyDeleteMy husband, on the other hand, has a pony tail to about middle back.
Your child is beautiful!
my firstborn had SHORT hair always dressed in BOY stuff and he still got mistaken for a girl until he was 3.5
ReplyDeleteanyway- not sure how relevant that tidbit was, but it was something to share...LOL
I think hair is just hair- long, short, spiked green, shaved.... it doesn't matter.
Your son have beautiful hair!
Let him keep in long. Since you like it, what is the problem? My son had long hair & one day he decided he wanted it short (he was maybe 11) I am the family hair stylist so yes, I cried while I cut. Then it was long again & I loved it. Now he is 33 & keeps his head shaved. But he says his mother should have long hair....
ReplyDeleteHe looks great to me! My advice to you is my advice to myself :) As a young bride, an infertile wife and an adoptive mom I have had more then my fair share of RUDE comments from random strangers. (Mostly in grocery stores, what is with that location?)
ReplyDeleteMy tactic is simple, I keep three choices in my back pocket 1) educate - explain why they are wrong and hopefully they will know better next time. 2) walk away - some people are not worth my time! 3) turn it back on them - I have to admit, this is my favorite! Example, I look at baby and say "Your adopted?!"
All three would work for your son :) It is all about giving us and our children support and empowerment. He holds the power and can choose which of the three to use in the situation. I hope this helps and let your son know that I think his hair is fabulous!
My middle son has naturally curly hair. When he was younger, he was petite and had such a cute face. People always thought he was a girl! He finally got old enough to get tired of hearing it and asked me to cut his hair. I cut it short and he looked like a totally different person. Even friends at church did not recognize him! It grew back out and he said he didn't want it buzzed again; but when I buzzed his brother's hair (I only planned to cut it shorter, but he jerked, LOL), he said he wouldn't mind if I did his too. I'm thinking about it because it's getting hot here and he has trouble with acne. But, honestly, some people still think he's a girl (when his hair is not VERY short).
ReplyDeleteI remember seeing pictures of all 4 of your kids and I wonder if people are even more likely to think this son is a girl because your other son (not the baby) has short hair.
His hair looks amazing! Let him decide how he wants it. There is nothing wrong with long hair on boys! (especially when it is that cute!)
ReplyDeleteHe is a beautiful boy. My 6 yo had the most beautiful curls ~ tiny, perfect little ringlets ~ and it was so hard to cut it, but I finally did because it was getting so long and people thought he was a girl and most in society don't follow the biblical command to wear gender specific clothes. Now, he has such coarse hair and I have to buzz it to keep it looking nice. I wish I would have let it grow! I miss those curls.
ReplyDeletemy husband has also long hair and in Ukraine (where we are from) it was a problem. Now we live in Germany and we have almost forgotten how it is, when people comment his haircut. We have 1 year son and we want, that he also has long hair. I think long hair is just beautiful no matter who you are. Maybe it'll help if you just speak with your son about people, who want to change him. And inspire him to be stronger:)
ReplyDeleteMy youngest has curly hair blond hair. I trimmed it a few times when he was little but at 2.5 he doesn't want it cut anymore. He has a white boy fro' and he loves it. When he wants it cut I will cut it. I think sometimes the major confusion comes when little boys have long hair with bangs.
ReplyDeleteWell... social norm is more in line with boys having short hair. While there is nothing wrong with your boy having long hair, he's going to get mistaken for a girl. You can't change that. Have you sat him down and given him the options? I mean, if you don't ask him if he wants to cut his hair, he's not going to know it is an option, right? Explain to him that he can keep it long, but that people will sometimes think he's a girl, and ask if he's okay with that. Or, tell him that he can cut it if he wants to. A three year old is old enough to make that choice if you give him all the options in simple terms.
ReplyDeleteI don't think it is right to expect people to know he's a boy just because of his clothing... girls wear boy-ish clothes, too, honestly. Like I said, most kids with long hair are girls these days - so the assumption isn't a bad one, or one meant to harm/hurt.
Well, honestly if I was behind you at the checkout stand, I would probably think he was a girl. I would come out of it either still assuming it, apologizing for the mistake, or counting my blessings that I didn't open my big mouth. But he is really cute, and if it makes him feel any better, you could always tell him about Samson in the bible- he was very masculine!
ReplyDeleteWe've got a 4 yr old boy. He hates a hair cut, so we dont force it. He has grown it and cut it but for the last year he has grown. It looks just like your son's hair minus the bangs. My son has told us, "I dont like bangs", so he its almost all one length. We came across your picture while looking for a solution for boys, other then the hat, to get the hair outa the face, for school and reading. Just wanted to say, we like long hair on boys.
ReplyDeletewe keep our sons hair long, but not as long as your son's. i think your son is adorable!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteokay, but my son's hair is like to his ears {Think Justin Beiber hair}. come on people! family and friends tell me constantly that my son needs a buzz cut. we have stupidly listened to others' requests and did a buzz on our son. it does NOT LOOK GOOD ON HIM =[ we love our sons long hair and swooped bangs. his hair is now curling at the ends and we LOVE it =] when chayden requests a cut, we get him a cut. we say "little or a lot off" and we fulfill his requests =] its just hair people. it doesn't define boy vs. girl. sheesh yanno?
such an interesting post. my son has extremely long hair also. it is frustrating when people call him a girl, but we talk about how both boys and girls have long hair. i mean, look at Jesus and the other men during that time... i know that he's since had it cut, but good for you for honoring his wishes!
ReplyDeleteIf you really plan on cutting it just buzz it off completely I would personally cut it all and donate it it's
ReplyDeleteHair it grows back
Did you ever cut his hair I know it's been over a year I think he would look great in a buzzcut. Please reply if you did and if you r planning on shaving it!
ReplyDelete